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Thriller at noon sometimes even good ideas don’t help

kidsparents2 yearschild3 yearsFeuilletonkidchildrenLenka Míkovcová4 yearsemotionskickingtry outrudeThrillergood ideaspaper shopshopkeeperstupid

I ONLY needed to buy a calendar. A small paper shop nearby seemed like a good choice. It’s close and it’s a small store. Upon entering you are like Alice in wonderland. Nothing has a fixed space, yet things are in order. Every envelope, napkin, diary has its own box without a top, one above the other and one next to another. Like a complete childhood dream.

Both children began to enjoy the easily accessible minutiae among the endless pyramids of boxes. All until an accidentally extracted box of napkins created an avalanche of boxes. This caused boxes filled with birthday cards, wrapping paper and other small things to fall everywhere. After the avalanche, there came a detailed study of the material. This unfortunately created a wave of displeasure mainly with two-year-old Eliška. The unsuccessful attempt for wistful pleasure left her in an emotional nightmare and she started twisting and turning while lying on the ground. The violent movements of her hands and feet were precisely aimed at the paper boxes, causing a shower of nearly everything around her. It couldn’t be helped by diverting attention, fulfilling her wishes in dreams or empathic reactions. Impatient Kryštof added to the confusion by delivering a precise kick into Eliška’s knee. I was stunned. The look on the shopkeepers face showed exactly what she thought of me.

I let Eliška twist and turn on her own and started cleaning up. We were leaving the shop five minutes later with two roles of cheap Christmas wrapping paper. I was glad that was behind us. I was wrong. At the doorstep, Kryštof decided to turn around and say: “Goodbye stupid lady!”. I just turned to make sure the shopkeeper was still breathing and quickly closed the door.

I had been my first time in that store and undoubtedly my last.

PS: Four year old Kryštof is getting to know the meaning of not only the word stupid, but also other rude words. He tries them out everywhere, whenever and on whomever. He is most delighted when people show a negative reaction because it proves he got their attention. After voicing disapproval with his statement, you can luckily usually disarm him with an absurd word connection such as “flying lemon” or whatever. These phrases will never fail to make him laugh-or propose playing a game.

Author: Lenka Míkovcová

Translation: Marek Hubbell

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