„Mom like an orange“ Patience like a melon, orange and cherrykidsparentschild2 years3 yearsFeuilletonchildrenkidLenka Míkovcová4 years5 years1 yearRespect and be RespectedemotionPavel KoprivaNováckováNevolováexpressclean upget dressedKoprivovaorangemelonangercherry
You know what I mean. You try to make kids clean up their toys, get dressed, etc., but nothing happens. You try the soft technique for a while, but then you run out of patience and you lose your temper or you just do it yourself. The outcome is dubious.
Luckily there is at least one more possibility. You can point out that their inaction lowers your patience which may eventually go away completely and you may become an unpleasant hellcat.
I compared the completely abstract concept of “lessening of patience” to the size of a melon, orange and then cherries so that Kryštof (4 years old) and Eliška (2 years old) could understand. I got this tip from Pavel and Taťana Kopřivovi*. Once you get to the cherry, it is at least clear to Kryštof that he had gone too far with me and I will not compromise. By one control question: “Mom, are you like an orange?” Kryštof can tell if he can still play for bit or that he has to stop immediately and, by the way, he was then interested in how I felt. It didn’t leave him calm when I answered YES. Thus, Kryštof got up and went to get dressed with the words, “So I’m going”.
At the same time, this is a way for me to calm down. It helps me stay calm a little longer when I describe my own feelings of discontent and let the kids know how I feel in the current situation. I succeed in preceding outbreaks of anger and rage, which are undoubtedly stressful and unpredictable for the children.
1st October 2011
*Respektovat a být respektován, Pavel Kopřiva, Jana Nováčková, Dobromila Nevolová, Taťjana Kopřivová, Pavel Kopřiva - Spirála, 2008
Author: Lenka Míkovcová
Translation: Marek Hubbell